Back into the wild I go!

So yesterday, I was officially released from the clinic after 17 days of being in a quiet and safe cocoon. Now don’t get me wrong, I did come out on a ‘day pass’ last Sunday, but this time it was different, I wasn’t coming back to my safety net.

Just before being discharged; after a tearful good bye to my fellow mental travelers, my partner and I had to meet with my psychiatrist and psychologist, to discuss my treatment and the plan moving forward, it was pleasant as my partner now had an opportunity to hear directly what was going on with me from the doctor’s mouth, that I have Bipolar Mood Disorder and that the next 6 months would be difficult. This gave him peace of mind and a better understanding of what to expect and that my moods are uncontrollable.

It was a joyous moment walking through those clinic doors and loading my luggage into the Ford Ranger, but as my partner pulled through the gates of the clinic parking lot, it suddenly hit me like a ton of bricks. Anxiety kicked in, I was battling to breath and became a tearful mess……I just realized I now had to face the world……no more safety cocoon.

But how blessed am I, my loving husband who has had to carry my burden and handle his own stress, grabbed my hand and squeezed it……”breath he said”. It was as if he his voice which projected love and serenity, pierced through my anxiety and reached my core, which calmed me down.

Sometimes we just need that hug, or that reassuring voice to calm us down. I am blessed and I am sure all of you are too. So do me a favor after reading this blog, hug your loved one the next time you see each other or just squeeze their hand and say I love you…..because it really does help.

I have left my cocoon, and it was hard but I now need to learn from the art that was on my wall, that I now need to work on changing myself into a butterfly; one that will not be defined by its illness.

Have a good night all, and continue following, because tomorrow I am going to give some helpful tips that I need to practice myself.

This is Liam signing out for the night.